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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29411970">shot in the dark</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/lorberinne/pseuds/lorberinne'>lorberinne</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Blow Jobs, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Unhealthy Relationships</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 11:21:27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,514</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29411970</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/lorberinne/pseuds/lorberinne</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>For Gallireiweek day 4 - GalliRei making out</p><p>Porco looks around bored. There is only a desk with some books, a chair under a small window, and a few spare shotguns. So, this is where Braun hides. Just a useless place to rest if there isn’t even booze.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Reiner Braun/Porco Galliard</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>101</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>shot in the dark</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hello everyone! This fic is settled during chapter 97 after Reiner's suicide attempt. This is not a cute fic so please if you are uncomfortable with dark themes don't read this.<br/>Also this is the first time I write smut. Good luck!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The sun is starting to drop over the horizon as Porco makes his way alone towards the gates, glad to finally leave the headquarters behind.</p><p>The yard is almost empty, the Warriors cadets’ training is over and only a few people are around at this time. </p><p>After the Warriors’ meeting and the usual paperwork, Pieck decided to sleep on the couch while Zeke and Colt went to play catch ball somewhere else. Braun disappeared like always, hiding his face from the world. </p><p>Frustrations and humiliations grip Porco’s guts. Braun saving his ass earlier still burns. How could he be so stupid? Of course those assholes were listening. </p><p>Porco kicks a stone and watches it roll on the soil before it gets stopped by a booted foot. He looks up and grits his teeth at Braun’s presence. </p><p>Speak of the devil. </p><p>He should probably thank him for what he did earlier but he doesn’t want to, so he will not. </p><p>“Galliard,” Braun just says, his voice rough and low, like the voice of a man who spent the whole afternoon crying. </p><p>“What?” Porco asks, starting to lose his patience. </p><p>“I-” Braun lowers his gaze, like always, and then looks back at him. </p><p>His pupils are wide and haunted. Red lines spread in the white of his eyes. They always look haunted since he came back from that island. And Porco thinks that’s good. That bastard should never find relief, but unfortunately he will in two years and this eats Porco inside. </p><p>Porco takes a step forward and keeps glaring. “Well?” he prompts. </p><p>Braun swallows and Porco follows the lines of his neck, the light skin that he has bitten before- Porco shakes his head and makes to get away but suddenly Braun grabs his arm.</p><p>“What?” Porco snaps after a moment of shock. “The hell you think you are doing?”</p><p>“Just follow me,” Braun grunts, dragging him away from the gates.</p><p>Braun’s grip on him is strong, so different from the strength of that scrawny kid from a long time ago, his hand still manages to have a full grip around Porco’s wrist. </p><p>Porco should fight him off, tell him to fuck off, but he is curious. </p><p><em> Curiosity killed the cat, </em>his brother told him once when Porco wanted to know where their young pretty neighbor went every other night before curfew, reappearing only the next day. But Porco isn’t that innocent kid anymore and neither is Braun.</p><p>Braun takes him to an abandoned warehouse far away from the headquarters. Porco looks around bored. There is only a desk with some books, a chair under a small window, and a few spare shotguns. So, this is where Braun hides. Just a useless place to rest if there isn’t even booze. There is barely any light in there.</p><p>“Well, the fuck is this about-” Porco starts before he finds himself pushed on the wall by Braun. </p><p>He is intoxicated with Braun’s pine tree scent before Braun drops on his knees and undoes Porco’s trousers. </p><p>So, this is how he does want to do it. It’s weird, Braun isn’t someone who takes initiative. They have fucked around just a few times in the darkest of the nights when both he and Braun reach the deepest places of their minds and nobody can see them. </p><p>Porco figures that this change of route isn’t bad and lets Braun do his thing for now. </p><p>Braun pulls down his underwear, takes his cock in his hand, and starts to move it up and down in slow motion. </p><p>Porco almost lets a moan escape and bites his lower lip, eager and hungry as his cock gets hard. His eyes lock on that too bright hair just as Braun starts to lick him with his wicked tongue.</p><p>“Fuck-” Porco pants, holding himself up with a hand against the rough bricks. </p><p>Braun takes all of him and his mouth feels so tight around his erection. </p><p>The room is filled with the obscene sounds Braun makes and Porco’s heavy breathing. </p><p>Braun is so eager to swallow him like he wants Porco’s cock to mark his mouth, to always remember the shape of it, the weight it feels. Porco’s vision starts to get blurry and he just wants to stay there forever with Braun sucking his cock and nothing else. </p><p>Braun starts bobbing his head faster and Porco can feel it coming. He is on the brink of his orgasm and he tries to resist, to make it last longer. He bites his hand, and tastes his own blood to not already give in- but then he is fully warped by Braun and Porco grabs that hair that looks like gold.</p><p>He fucks into that mouth, his cock touches and invades Braun deeper than ever.</p><p>The way Braun just takes it’s so wonderful and perfect- and Porco comes, in Braun’s mouth, eyes rolling to the back of his head and moaning loudly. </p><p>His vision is blinded by the pleasure and it takes him a moment to realize he slipped on the floor, legs open, almost sitting on Braun’s strong thighs. </p><p>Their gazes meet for a moment before Braun’s gaze moves to his lips and then kisses him. Porco answers right back, maybe a bit sloppy since he is still high from the orgasm. He pulls Braun closer and sits on his legs, straddling him. </p><p>He grabs Braun’s head, bites his lower lip. They kiss and kiss, all tongue, teeth, and saliva. Braun’s mouth opens to him just right and Porco can still taste himself and tiny drops of salty tears, Braun’s desperation- </p><p>Porco breaks the kiss and when he sees the tears run down from those amber eyes he feels his throat cut by the thorns. </p><p>Braun crying during sex makes sense but during kissing? </p><p>“I’m sorry, I-” Braun whispers. “I needed to forget- they still need me- the kids-”</p><p><em> Forget what? </em>What the hell is he talking about? </p><p>Porco frowns, his eyes move to the chair under the window that strangely Braun didn’t use, then he stares at the desk where there is still the abandoned shotgun and some bullets-</p><p>A loaded shotgun in an abandoned warehouse. </p><p>Braun needed to forget- </p><p>Everything burns, his stomach, his limbs. The scent of sex. Porco feels like throwing up. This is a nightmare. A nightmare Braun decided to drag him to, to use him to clean his sins away. </p><p>“You didn’t,” Porco hisses with the venom Braun fills in him. “You have no right-”</p><p>Braun shakes, bends his head, and grips Porco’s shirt. </p><p>“I’m sorry-”</p><p>Porco doesn’t want to hear apologies, he doesn’t want his desperation, he doesn’t want tears that are born from Marcel’s blood.</p><p>Braun sobs loudly and Porco realizes that his eyes are starting to get wet too.</p><p>“Stop it,” Porco says, the word catching in his throat. “Just <em> stop it </em>.”</p><p>Stop crying, stop acting fucked up, stop dragging him in this hell.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” Braun says again like a prayer and in search of atonement. </p><p>Porco took a bullet once, and it didn’t hurt like that. This is worse. So much worse. </p><p>He pushes Braun away from him and raises to his feet. It’s pathetic the way Braun falls curled on the floor like a broken doll that Porco could order around as his puppet master. </p><p>Once it would have made him feel thrilled but now Porco just feels disgusted with Braun, with <em>himself</em>.</p><p>It takes Porco a moment to put on back his trousers, his hands tremble with suppressed rage that could be temporarily extinguished by pounding Braun with his fits and crushing him with his bites- but this is just what Brauns wants him to do. </p><p>To hate him, to make him suffer, to be his drug and remember him for the rest of his days the horrible human being he has become- but Porco won’t give it to him, not this time. </p><p>Every time he gives in, Braun wins and Porco doesn’t have any intention to give him another victory again. Not when Braun already won the most important one.</p><p>Porco will cut those strings that he actually can’t control and are just squeezing his heart. Braun wants him to be his judge, jury, and executioner when Porco could only be his fellow prisoner, guilty of falling for his brother’s murderer. </p><p>“This ends here.” </p><p>“Wait-” Braun says, still has the nerve to talk. In his suffering, Braun manages to be still the condescending asshole he is. </p><p>“Just stop,” Porco repeats again. He doesn’t even know if he is saying this to Braun or himself now. To not fall back on the trap that is Reiner Braun. </p><p>Braun just nods. Porco watches him lying there on the floor, his head bent, unable to look at Porco like the coward he is. </p><p>“Don’t forget about the kids.” </p><p>Braun flinches and looks up at him at his words.</p><p>“Don’t forget about-” Porco bites his inner left cheek and looks away from Braun’s pleading eyes now. </p><p>It must be enough. Let it be <em>enough</em>.</p><p>Porco opens the door, steps outside, and kicks the door behind.</p>
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